Tuesday, January 31, 2017

A Little Venting

I do not hate my job.

This is what I am having to tell myself every morning lately before I head into work.

I love so many things about my job. I love being around kids. I love seeing them learn. I love finding resources. I love making centers.

Here's what I do not love. Skipping half my lunch because a parent has to take "just a sec" to talk to me from the window of their car. Being told to do an hour long training in my spare time. Not being able to ask for donations from parents. Having my Wi-Fi go out and the tech never stopping by. Parents who think their 5 or 6 year old is always telling them the whole truth and getting yelled at because I "let other kids bully their child." Getting told by the school district that 25 kindergarteners does not qualify as enough to get an aid. Mom helpers who say they will come to help then never show up. Being expected to do 2 hours of Language Arts instruction, 30 minutes of technology time, 30 minutes of P.E., 1 hour of math, 30 minutes of science, and 30 minutes of social studies in 2 hours and 50 minutes.

Lately I just feel like I am being asked to do more and more as a teacher and getting less and less help. No other job would require this. That's where my main frustration lies. I have 49 students who I need to get ready for first grade by May. That is the same as having 49 ongoing projects that have a definite deadline.

I'm drowning and all the lifeboats I call for aren't showing up.

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Long Distance

In the past few weeks I have seen a number of people publicize their despair over being temporarily separated from their significant other. 6 weeks or less is the amount of time I have seen. While dating and through almost our entire year long engagement Derick and I spent a maximum of 22 continual days together and a minimum of 10 weeks apart. Being apart was more a norm than being together was.
I know being away for your significant other is hard, I would never want to belittle that. Putting it on blast everyday is so incredibly annoying, though. I lived long distance for over a year. I only saw Derick 4 times in 15 months. Not to mention it cost me about $1000 just to be able to see him each time.
Moral of my story: before you complain everyday to the entire world about your problem, think about how maybe it isn't as bad as you think it is. Others have definitely been through harder times and made it out.

P.S. I'm feeling very anti privileged-white-American lately.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Surprising Relationship Builder

Derick and I have only been married for just over 9 months. We are definitely still learning how to do this whole marriage thing.

We do a lot to try to build our relationship. Date nights is a huge one for us. Especially because we still live with my parents.

Last week we went to dinner and a movie, typical but always fun. We went to see The Jungle Book. (LOVED it, if you haven't seen it yet, GO!) We got so much more out of that date than I could have ever expected.

Derick and I grew up in VERY different worlds. I grew up in an upper middle class family in America, he grew up in a neighborhood that didn't even have paved roads until just a few years ago in the Caribbean. There definitely is not a lot we have to relate to each other when it comes to our childhoods.

But, while watching this movie, it was like we were both 6 watching the original cartoon. We were singing along to the songs, predicting what scene was going to come up next, and laughing at the added lines Baloo said. We connected in a way he had never connected before.

Marriage isn't easy, it is a lot of work. You have to actively put in the time to make sure you are both growing together. That is why I loved this experience, it was by accident. We went out to just spend time as a couple and be together. A movie isn't always the best way to enhance a relationship, but we both love movies. However, this movie did bring us closer together in a way I will be forever grateful. I got to a bit of child-Derick, which isn't always the easiest to see now that we are so far from the world he grew up in.

We will DEFINITELY be going to see The Legend of Tarzan.

Monday, June 13, 2016


I have now completed my second year of teaching. My first year was rough, as to be expected. I was in a city I didn't know, far from friends and family. I didn't know anyone I worked with and I wasn't super confident in the first grade curriculum. Even though I jumped at the chance to come back to Utah to be closer to friends and family, I grew to love the other first grade teachers. I became very close with another first year teacher, and we worked together on almost everything. The other teachers slowly brought us both under their wings and we even went out together a few times to blow off steam after school. One of the hardest things about working in Nevada was the lack of supplies available to me. On top of that I was working at a school in a very low income area, so most of the parents did not have the means to donate much. It was rough and I spent a lot of my own money. But I learned a lot and applied what I learned to this past year.

This past school year was a completely different experience. There were some things I knew I would get when I came back to Utah: friends and family near by, more involved parents, and more supplies readily available to me. One thing I did not get that I was positive I would have was a team of teachers to work with. It is the norm in Utah schools that teachers in the same school teaching the same grade level work together as a team. I was one of three kindergarten teachers at my school. The other two teachers were anything but welcoming to me. I was excluded from meetings and conversations, nothing was shared with me, no planning was ever done together, they would assign me to do things without telling me, and they were flat out rude to me.

It was such a trying year.

I am so grateful for my sweet husband who would let me talk through my daily trials and would build me up when I was feeling so low.

I was also so fortunate to have a wonderful class. They were sweet and worked hard. I did not have to do much reteaching or reminding of rules and procedures. Lastly, I had a pretty steady class, not a lot of move in a move outs.

My real saving grace this year, though - the other teachers at the school. I worked with third and fourth grade in the afternoons everyday. They were so kind and made me feel like part of their team. Everything I expected to get from my own team, but didn't get, I got from those other teachers.

My husband always says to me, "If you love your job 4 out of 5 days a week, you are doing the right job." Without those other teachers, I don't know if I could have said that I loved my job 4 out of 5 days a week. I love kids, and I love teaching. But without a supporting team surrounding me, it just wasn't enough. Every interaction with the other kinder teachers left me in a more and more negative place.

I am moving schools again for the next school year. I have already met my new grade level team, what a breath of fresh air! They are so warm and inviting! We are all already friends on Facebook after only meeting a few times.

I am very optimistic going into this new school year, and can't wait for all the opportunities to come!

Monday, April 14, 2014

I Love Adoption

I am doing adoption presentations again! I have missed them since I couldn't do any while student teaching. Retelling my story is so fun for me and I love looking at these old, and some new, pictures and remembering how far this journey has come!
19 and pregnant

One week old newborn

My first birthday after Trae was born

Trae's first birthday one week later

All the hats I've made for him

All the cuddles

And the many, MANY head buts

The kisses

The adventures

And now his new brother

It has been a crazy, fun, awesome three and half years. I can't wait to see what comes next!

Monday, January 20, 2014

A Goal

As many people know, I am the period owner of a Fitbit. I love this little guy. It gets me to move more just about any other motivation. I got my stats from last year and I walked over 840 miles last year. I have decided that this year I am going to try to hit 1000 miles this year. I did the math, and that is about 2.7 miles a day. As of right now, I'm roughly 22 miles behind schedule. I've been a little lazy so far this year.

Luckily, it's a leap year so I have one woke extra day to try to get there.

Here's to making this year more productive than the last!

Monday, January 6, 2014

Curiouser and curiouser

I do not understand boys.

Last night this boy I had been texting basically non stop all day keeps hinting he wants me to invite him over. I had been cleaning all day and changing my room up so I didn't shower, which may me weary of asking him to come over. Finally, at 1:30 am I do invite him over because I was working on a hat and I just wanted to finish it. He comes over and he sit and talk. I'm sorry, when I invite you over after midnight I expect to cuddle. Not sit near each other and chat. That is a daylight activity.

He really wanted to come over to talk for an hour and a half? I mean, we had good conversations, but I can talk and cuddle and the same time.

Here's that hat. I love it. Took barely over 2 hours to make.